san juan capistrano

my boyfriend bailed on me at the last minute for our trip to san juan capistrano...which was very disappointing to say the least! i couldn't get out of the hotel registration so i dragged my youngest daughter emily, slightly kicking and screaming but guaranteeing her she'd have a good time!!

i lucked out with my guarantee (as i have never been there before and didn't know quite what to expect!) and we ended up having a fantastic time...otherwise i think i might have heard about it for awhile!!

we even had a funny story! we were starting to get hungry and craved some mexican food we saw at a popular taco stand. when we got into line i saw that they only accepted cash, we only had $4 between us, so we walked to the edge of town where we saw a gas station earlier in the day when scouting out parking spaces. i bought a cold bottle of water, took out $20 and headed back to the taco stand, figuring we had about 20 minutes left before the movie started that we wanted to see. when we got back into line again we both noticed at the exact same time two rather large green signs declaring an ATM machine was just at the other end of the stand for those who didn't have cash...ugh...we couldn't figure out how neither one of us noticed those signs earlier!!! oh well...we got even more exercise, the burritos were absolutely delicious and we made it to bad teacher in plenty of time!!

 this kooky rooftop sits at the end of a spacious field once filled to the brim with beautiful saffron wildflowers, now turned brittle and brown from the heat. i can't tell what it is or even what road might lead to revealing it's purpose. is it an ashram or church or something totally different? it's a mystery that i hope to figure out one day...cuz i'm very curious about it!!

 last weeks theme for the blogging e-course i'm participating in, was on authenticity.

to be honest i came to dislike that word after the start of a new relationship many, many years ago with a man named david. he bounced that word around in every conversation, and guess what...he turned out to be one of the least honest and authentic persons i had ever met. 

i can honestly say that finding my true or authentic voice on this blog has not been easy...at all!! 

but then i realized that i am like a fine strand of baroque pearls! each individual pearl is me...how i act at a party where i only know the hostess (very quiet) is me, how i am when i am out in nature hiking with josie (contemplative) is me, how i am when my family and friends gather on a friday night playing board games (loud, laughing till my belly hurts, goofy) is me, when i'm with my boyfriend (silly, loving) is me, when drivers won't let me in, it's getting late and my daughter may not make it to class on time (super pissed off! swearing!) very me!

so how do i possibly find the sweet spot in writing posts on my blog when i am all of those unique things?

i don't really know yet.

i know that i want to dig deeper, stay true to my blogs purpose, and not hide or shrink in fear of revealing too much. i really do need to step out of my safety zone, tell more stories, knowing that it's all me, that i have many voices...all of them true and unmistakeably me!

photos taken yesterday at the japanese gardens in van nuys, california

chalk festival

blue taped boxes 

red, white and blue umbrellas

 worn boxes of chalk

 sweltering artists

tangerine, red, lilac

 half full water bottles

colossal crowds of onlookers

white chalk marks

 drawings of clowns, divas and dragons

 cameras clicking

adele remix blaring

 indigo blue, black and lemon

straw hats

turquoise sharks, apricot fish and purple octopus

 knee pads and cardboard

the smell of freshly popped popcorn

june gloom and other things

it was sooo chilly on sunday morning that i could barely hang around the mountain tops too long soaking in all that misty beauty. but i so lucked out and for the first time saw a large buck...although josie chased it, so it was gone in a flash, but was that ever a treat!! then she ticked off a rattlesnake hidden deep in the tawny weeds, thank goodness he warned us with his rattle so i could get josie away in time.

a new commission i just received of peni.

(c) Under the Shadow of the Oak  2011 Kathryn Hansen

i finally finished my oak tree drawing and have entered it in a competition. hopefully i got the resolution correct so it doesn't get kicked back. the few editing programs i have make it a huge guessing game. i think it's time to invest in photoshop!!

i rarely write about my daughters on my blog because i don't want to intrude on their privacy but i am just sooooo darn proud of my daughter allie and the end of this long, long chapter in her life! her high school graduation ceremony took place last thursday evening...and let me tell you, i really choked up when she entered the field to pomp and circumstance! it's very bittersweet...i am so fired up for allie to now really start living her life and yet sad that this is it...it will never be the same. her journey has started and she's off and running!

and finally...i signed up for liv lanes e-course a few weeks ago and even tho i am so totally behind in the class, it has proven very valuable so far with more material to read than i can keep up with right now!! the course is closed but i highly recommend looking into the next session, or just check out her lovely blog here!

Jump, and you will find out how to unfold your wings as you fall.

~Ray Bradbury~

wild parrots caught my attention with a cacophony of screeches in my front yard early saturday morning

 saw this sweet hummingbird on the way to the hiking trail that misty saturday morning

 

reflecting

 i am one who always sits quietly and reflects on the meaning of my experiences...so i've been thinking a lot about the art show last weekend. and i realized just how much i have grown and changed over the last few years. normally not doing as well financially as i had hoped would have set me into self-pity for awhile, wanting to throw in the towel, but this time i noticed that instead i thought about all the things i had learned, new ways to improve my booth and enthusiastic for what i want to accomplish in the near future with my photos and drawings. more than ever, i am really sure of my direction with my art and life. and i love that through metaphysics i have learned to be way more aware and mindful, looking for deeper truths, which in turn makes me feel soooo much happier than ever before. and when my happiness lifts me like that, it opens up my life to way more possibilities and opportunities. all very exciting!